being a mom is hard

Goofing off on vacation at Universal Orlando

That’s not to say it isn’t worth it. I love being a mom. As this Mother’s Day comes to a close however, I reflect on how much pressure we put on ourselves to be the perfect mother to our children. That may be different things to different moms, but suffice it to say we all want them to be safe and happy.. It also varies by a child’s abilities. By which I mean if you have a child with a disability, you may not be shuttling them around to lots of sporting activities, but rather you may work your ass off to find other ways for your child to connect to their peers.

This guy makes it all worth it!

As a mom with a disability, I try and fail a lot of times to connect my child with physical activities since I cannot participate in or teach him myself. I feel like I fail a lot though. I get busy with my job, which is fairly high level and which I enjoy and in which I take pride. That often gets in the way of spending “quality” time together. By quality I mean something other than running around making dinner, cleaning up after, helping with homework, getting the kid into the bath, dressed for bed, etc. some days it feels like the days speed by with no quality time at all. Then I remind myself, I did help with his homework, help him get his shower set up, made sure he brushed his teeth, read to him until it was time to shut off the lights, and when he asked me to stay for comfort, I did, even though I fell asleep half the time.

Kid is back there somewhere. Think I’m overcompensating??

As moms we need to forgive ourselves. Your kids aren’t always going remember all the bake sales, School Halloween Fest events, or school meetings you attend. They won’t grow up hating you because you occasionally forgot to put their water bottle or lunch in their backpack. We moms are never going to be perfect and let’s face it, work life balance is a farce. It doesn’t exist. Some days I’m great at work, some days I’m a great mom. Those two are usually mutually exclusive though, meaning if I’m great at one I usually suck at the other that day. Then my kiddo reminds me that he loves me so much and that I’m a great mom, because even though sometimes I have to work well past dinner, I am present when he needs me. He knows I’m doing my best.

So if I’m trying, putting in the effort, I allow myself to feel like a good mom. We all make mistakes, we’re all human, and being a mom is hard. It’s ok to admit it and it’s totally worth it.

Happy Mother’s Day!